I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
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