i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
Just invented taco cereal.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Randomize
