i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
Randomize
