Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Let the clothes fall where they may.
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
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