are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
