The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
