ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Randomize
