we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Randomize
