its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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