What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize