the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
