oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
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