to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize
