I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Just cropdusted the office
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
