one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
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