Three words: puerto rican gang bang
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
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