you mean i was at the winter classic?
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
