Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
