Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
Randomize
