FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
