Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Randomize
