I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
Randomize
