Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
Randomize
