Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(813): View more from Florida

Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.

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(240): View more from Maryland

I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.

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(973): View more from New Jersey

i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me

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(509): View more from Washington

There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.

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(912): View more from Georgia

Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.

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(604): View more from British Columbia

I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.

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(704): View more from North Carolina

i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?

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