can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
Randomize