That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Randomize