Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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