He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
Randomize
