If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Randomize
