who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
Randomize
