I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
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