Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
