my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
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