In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Randomize
