I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
Randomize
