Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
Randomize
