Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
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