so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
