What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Randomize
