Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
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