Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Randomize
