Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
Randomize
