Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
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