If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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