belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
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