I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
