hell yes lets make some ravioli
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
