We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
