Apparently you make a good broom.
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Randomize
