Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Randomize
